1. |
15 Minutes
04:18
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15 Minutes
words & music Allan Thomas
Waiting for my ship to come in
Dreaming about my 15 minutes
The CD became a top-ten hit
Alert the media about my fifteen minutes
Wrote a speech for the grammy awards
Bought a tux I couldn't afford
Tune in watch me win it
Had a premonition it would transpire
Never gave up or lost the fire
It'll be in my New York Times obit
Big 15 minutes 15 minutes
The video went viral I cashed in
YouTube sensation for 15 minutes
Celebrity rehab after a bender
The usual baggage on the agenda
Lord you've got a big hand in it
Can't you just begin it
That 15 minutes 15 minutes
That's all
Paparazzi follow you
One of the rarefied and few
After that review in Rolling Stone
Date starlets under twenty-five
Sing on Saturday Night Live
Ready for my closeup if you please
15 minutes 15 minutes
Mark my my words this ain't no jive
Be as busy as a beehive
Like Popeye after eating spinach
We'll take a bath in the money I'll amass
Pretend it's gonna last
The sky's the limit
For 15 minutes just 15 minutes
Accolades off the hook
Record downloads of the book
Your name tweeted 'round the world
The babes beyond reach before
Swear it's you they adore
When it's gone I'll miss it
I'm sure sure gonna miss it my 15 minutes
My 15 minutes just 15 minutes
That's all I can taste it now
©2018 Black Bamboo Music - BMI
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2. |
Aquadesiac
04:47
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3. |
Could've Been Worse
04:25
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Could've Been Worse
words & music Allan Thomas
Somehow or other it could've been worse
Like having your car stuck in reverse
Being subject to bad rhyming verse
Whoa now could've been worse
It could’ve been worse
You get the runaround instead of reimbursed
Being put under a spell or a curse
Falling overboard almost getting immersed
Try to remember it could've been worse always be worse
Coming in last when you should'a been first
Not receiving your just desserts
Your reputation getting besmirched
Like I said before it could've been worse
Can't predict one second to the next
Things can flip 180 like on Everest
Unless your riding in the back of a hearse
Don't forget it could've been worse
Things could’ve been worse
Always be worse
Throat's dry waters dispersed Could be lyin' in the desert dyin' of thirst If you don't need a full time nurse Then I repeat things could've been been worse Always be worse
Waiting in vain for tiny windblown surf
Or have someone steal your piggy bank or purse
Longtime lover leaves you in the lurch
Whoa now could've been worse much worse
Think you got it bad take a good look around
Bound to be somebody even further down
When things become highly adverse
Better keep in mind things could've been worse much worse
Life's cruel and capricious I've done the research
Knock you off your high and mighty perch
As you bounce from the bottom it might sound terse
But you must remember it could've been worse
Whoa now much worse always be worse
Even worse always be worse
Even worse always be worse
©2018 Black Bamboo Music - BMI
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4. |
Dating Game
04:44
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Dating Game
words - Allan Thomas
music - Jim 'Kimo' West and Allan Thomas
Lied about his age height and weight
On the questionnaire for an online date
Uploaded six photos maybe ten years old
Too bad if they believe everything they're told
It's the dating game
Worked hours on his profile to entice
A late night liaison with miss sugar and spice
She wants someone honest kind and sincere
He wants a nice rack and a sweet derrière
Thats the dating game
Into the sunset you both shall ride
Dream lover by your side
If it all plays out
Thank the Dating game
Upgraded his account to beat the odds
Got down on his knees and appealed to the gods
One swipe right maybe he’ll get lucky
Won't have bathe alone with that rubber ducky no no no
She looked real tall
Could you even reach her
Slim blonde yoga teacher
Sad grey eyes slender neck
Could she be the one or five-car wreck
The dating game
Into the sunset you both shall ride
Your dream lover by your side
And If it doesn't go south
Thank the dating game
She logs on hoping for a match
Reel in the perfect catch
He holds the answer to all her prayers
Lets toast to the future of the happy pair
A suckers born every minute on the hour
Will you pluck a thorn or pick a flower
Could end up even more sad and lame
Messing around in the dating game
The mating game
Into the sunset you both shall ride
Dream lovers side by side
Yes it's guaranteed
Yes welcome to dreamland where hope resides
A bottle of Dom your stunning bride
Thats the promise of the dating game
Just pay the fee you'll discover
Your long-lost significant other
Thats the nature of the dating game
That’s the dating game
It ain't a booty call
That's what she told me no no
©2018 Black Bamboo Music - BMI
Westernmost Music - ASCAP
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5. |
El Sueno de Repitido
04:14
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Instrumental - music by Allan Thomas ©2018 Black Bamboo Music - BMI
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6. |
Good To Go
04:40
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Good To Go
words & music - Allan Thomas
Caught two real good ones
From Flatrock through the Bowl then got
Mowed down mopped up stuck in the rinse cycle
Surfboard banged my head thought I'd joined the dead
Coughed up sea foam and H20 instead
But I'm good to go
Yes I'm whoa I'm good to go
Thought I'd windsurf at the YMCA
Sea was angry windblown spray
My rig tried to take flight before I reached the launching zone
Nearly sliced my ankle bone
But I'm good to go - yes I
Oh I'm good to go
Sailboarding overpowered everything on the line
Having to jump ten-foot faces time after time
Couldn't keep my board in the water
Survival was the goal
Would scare the pants off any mortal soul
But I'm good to go yes I soldier on
I'm good to go
At some point we have to make our way back to shore
But you can't resist the urge to take it one step more
Oh yeah
Six bandaids later and a contusion or two
But I'll bounce back tomorrow and start anew
Let's head home baby get some ice on my heel
Give it a little rest and see what's the deal
I'll be good to go yes I
I'm good to go
When you play with a tigress beware of its claw
It act real coy then it's shock and awe
Like a razor sharp reef or getting raked over the coals
Gonna pay with a pounding that's the way I rolls
I'm good to go - Yes I whoa I good to go
Soldier on good to go
At some point we have to make our way back to shore
Can't resist the urge to step it up one notch more
Oh yeah
Good to go
Ooh I'm good to go
Soldier on good to go
Good to go
Soldier on good to go
©2018 Black Bamboo Music - BM
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7. |
If Only
03:57
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If Only
words & music - Allan Thomas
If you could surf like Slater sing like brother Ray
Be a flying Wallenda for just one day
Slip outta your skin into something new
See whats it's like if you weren't you
If only
Ten years younger thirty pounds lighter
Have the physique of a prize fighter
Find your name in a billionaires will
Win the love of a super model
If only
I'd conquer the world give peace a chance
Require my subjects to learn how to dance
Pass out money on a silver platter
Eat till I burst without getting fatter
If only If only
Shoulda listened to what the ex had to say
About saving up but I pissed it away
Never bought a home when prices were low
Now I missed the boat and I've got nothing to show
If only
Get food on my face when I eat
If only I could be more neat
Make mistakes and then repeat If only
I'm vain as one could be
You know she wrote that song about me
Save someone from drowning be hailed as a hero
More famous than Bobby De Niro
If only
This luck has to change for the better
Like a lull in some funky weather
Win the lotto or kill it in Vegas
Pick up a brush and paint like Degas
Get on a roll where you just can't miss
Become the guy the girls just can't resist
If only I could stop saying if only
If only, if only, yeah if only
©2018 Black Bamboo Music - BMI
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8. |
In Search Of...
04:08
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Instrumental - music by Allan Thomas ©2018 Black Bamboo Music - BMI
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9. |
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Is That Asking Too Much?!
words & music Allan Thomas
I'd like a car rides like a Rolls
Drives invisibly through highway tolls
Changes color or clear as glass
Runs on air instead of gas
Is that asking too much
Is that asking too much
Could use some good news
I'm up for or a change
A rich divorcee who's not deranged
Fly to Paris for a fresh baguette
Win beaucoup bucks playing roulette
Is that asking too much
You think I'm asking too much
Make it snappy I'm in a rush
Is that asking too much
Land a job pays me to think
I'll make dirty water safe to drink
Do my part for the human race
Make the world a better place
Is that asking too much
Is that asking too much
Nobel prize Midas touch
Is that asking too much
Am I asking too much
Dreamt I was a star of film and stage
Respected like a revered sage
Ensconced in my Malibu mansion
Just me and Scarlett Johansson
Is that asking too much
Am I asking too much
Buy a ranch in Texas down in La Grange
Raise a herd of beef and sing Home On The Range
Extra zeros on my paycheck
And two cowgirls dangling off my neck
Is that asking too much
Am I asking too much
Black Mazarati kevlar clutch
Is that asking too much
Too much
I wanna world with no war
Money enough to feed the poor
All religion rolled into one
Vote for me consider it done
Is that asking too much
You think I'm asking too much
Heal the sick with just a touch just a touch
Is that asking too much
Am I asking too much
Am I asking too much
©2018 Black Bamboo Music - BMI
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10. |
Makani 'Olu 'Olu
03:02
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Instrumental - music by Allan Thomas ©2018 Black Bamboo Music - BMI
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11. |
On Another Note
03:28
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Instrumental - music by Allan Thomas ©2018 Black Bamboo Music - BMI
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12. |
Still Life
03:39
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Instrumental - music by Allan Thomas ©2018 Black Bamboo Music - BMI
Bryan Kessler - Brian Kessler Music - ASCAP
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13. |
There are No Words
04:24
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Instrumental - music by Allan Thomas ©2018 Black Bamboo Music - BMI
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14. |
Troubled Times
04:45
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Troubled Times
words & music - Allan Thomas
Down in Africa and the Middle East
Nobody knows the meaning of peace
Step out your door poverty and crime
Where you go troubled times
Living in troubled times
Nothing but troubled times
Inner city suburbs too
Just like a plague that won't let go of you
Guns in the hood guns in school
Never reach your prime living in troubled times
Yeah living in troubled times
Hard to keep hope alive
Troubled times
Wake up at night thinking maybe it's a nightmare
But in the clear morning light It's the same story
Still living in troubled times
Yeah oh troubled times
High cost of living low paying jobs
President's a joke
But no one's laughing very hard
World gone mad waiting for a sign
Something gotta give end these troubled times
Live in troubled times
How to keep hope alive living in troubled times
Unholy soldiers on a killing spree
God forbid you believe differently
Refugees run and hide
Praying for a way out of these troubled times
Maybe it’s a nightmare
It’s the same story
Yeah troubled times
Ooh troubled times
Yeah living in troubled times
How to keep hope alive living in troubled times
Yeah end these troubled times
© 2018 Black Bamboo Music - BMI
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15. |
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Geezer Talk (Baby Boomer Blues)
words & music Allan Thomas
Geezer talk that's all we have to say
Are your knees holding up
How's your back today
Once we talked about girls and the state of the world
Now its aches and pains how it waxes and wanes
How's the new drug working on the lesion in your eye
Who's the best orthopedist to review an MRI
Geezer talk it's all we ever say
Isn't there something else besides our imminent decay
The stiffness in your neck sore tendons in your hand
That bunion on your foot that kills when you stand
The swelling in your finger when you press the remote
The sting you get when the kids call you an old goat
Geezer talk talkin' baby boomer blues
We're held together by titanium screws
Don't skip your medication go easy with that cane
Don't want to trip and break your hip or wind up with a sprain
Jim needs a new shoulder after falling from a tree
I need a new memory cause mine ain't what it used to be
Geezers used to do this they used to be that
Now their sitting on their rear drinkin' beer chewin' the fat
You groan when you get out of bed
Body feels like a ton of lead
There's pounding in your head that's just for starters
Docs numbers on speed dial should you get unsteady
Have ibuprofen at hand and an ice bag at the ready
Geezers lose their glasses on a continual basis
Can't read a thing or recognize anyones faces
Some weeks are better than others
Some you'd rather forget
But you wanna be in that number instead of the opposite
His ankles acting up again her tooth is 5-alarm
I'm a hypochondriac what's that throbbing in my arm
Geezer talk non-stop workin' up a sweat
Pray the fountain of youth gets discovered yet
The cortisone kicked in my knee's nice and numb
Just one shot away from a functioning thumb
Skin's thin as paper easily bruised and cut
Lost inches off my height what's happened to my butt
Geezer talk how they squawk the whining never end
Can hardly wait till the day you have to wear depends
Skip the bathroom mirror avoid the shocking sight
Hair that once was black skin no longer tight
You meet the chiropractor hoping for some relief
Then the psychiatrist to alleviate your grief
Geezers take supplements as if they were candy
Got a hot water bottle and first aide kit handy
Sue claims it ain't easy for a geezer to date
Different degrees of decrepitude right out of the gate
Has a defibrillator that's state of the art
In case she has to revive a geezers heart
Geezer talk revolves around a similar story
Quit now if your faint hearted when the going gets gory
David reads X-Rays just like a pro
Friends ask his opinion of the symptoms they show
But the dog stole his dentures and people have to mime
Cause he lost his hearing aide for the umpteenth time
Geezer talk is something only geezers can relate
Need a cure for geezeritis before it's too late
Watch out for infections and things like pneumonia
Be sure to have a friend that'll always phone ya
When your an elder the clock ticks faster
And it seems like there's always an impending disaster
Geezer talk yup it's a cryin' shame
But you can't go back to looking or feeling the same
Ed tried yoga but just couldn't stretch
They showed him the door cause he was acting like a letch
So he took to gambling on bingo nights
And hooked up with a geezerette in leopard-skin tights
Geezers gab for hours you'll soon discover
Love to complain about one thing or the other
Stuffed my vaporizer with medicinal weed
Got a stack of medical journals I just have to read
My only wish is for a peaceful night
Wake up tomorrow resume the fight
A geezer greeting is more than just hello
You ask how's their ticker and cholesterol
Vinny ain't the same since he took Viagra
Thinks every nights like a honeymoon in Niagara
At first it was fun now it's off the scale
His wife tries to run but it's of no avail
Geezer talk will somehow always be a thing
His foots in a cast her arms in a sling
It's time to pay the piper for all that fun
For the wild and risky things that you ever done
Better make the most of what you been given
Right now while there's time to do some livin'
Geezer talk on and on it goes discuss the next surgery's cons and pros You lie awake and wonder what's in store
You get to where you think you can't take no more
All things considered it's been quite a journey
But love to stick around before they heave me on that gurney
Geezer moving slow slow as a tortoise
Tryin' to stay ahead of Mr. Rigor Mortise
©2018 Black Bamboo Music - BMI
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Allan Thomas Hanalei, Hawaii
Aloha and welcome to my Bandcamp Music Store home page. Here you can listen to full-length samples of all seven Allan Thomas albums and three singles. Also to be found are credits, photos, stories and lyrics for all songs. Dig in...
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